A Virgo's New Groove
On birthdays and our obsession with categories
Enjoying Carefree Mag? Tap the heart & share it! 😍
Share on Twitter | Share on Facebook | Share via email | View past stories
Hey y'all,
Birthdays are weird. It's the one day of the year where you can go all out celebrating yourself unabashedly and without judgement—which should technically make it the best day of the year, right? But I've noticed that birthdays seem to stress out almost everyone I know, and in a past life, that included yours truly.
Today is my birthday, btw.
In my twenties, birthdays were the day I’d learn how little people liked me. If someone didn't reach out, show up to whatever bday shindig I planned, or at least give me a shout-out on their Instagram stories, then a-ha, gotcha! It would finally become clear that all the other good times we had during the year was a lie. Dramatic much 🙃 And whew, the stress!? Shout-out to therapy; ain't nobody got time for that anymore.
My birthdays now are strictly for enjoyment—whether solo or with whoever is near me at the time. I've started to really lean in and embrace the unknown beauty of our own little New Year's Day.
Currently, I’m in New York; in-between a month long trip zigzagging across the Midwest, south, and east coast where I've been solo exploring, bae-cationing, dancing my ass off at friend's weddings, meeting new adorable nieces, clinking champagne glasses to a new (and fabulous) age, getting my entire life at the Renaissance concert, overindulging in good food, all while juggling remote work.
I'm staying with my older cousin and will be spending the day playing with my nieces, thrifting, and talking with my family and friends back home. Oh, and I'm going to find the best donut and a slice of oxtail pizza, because why tf not? I had a cozy birthday dinner last night with my NYC crew at Popular. It's been lowkey, free-flowing, and carefree—I feel incredibly blessed, loved, and grateful and that's exactly how I want it to be.
This Week's Story
Surprise—this one is from me! I actually wrote this for ESSENCE magazine last year, but didn't get to share it with y'all. And since the Virgos are Virgo-ing this Virgo season, I thought it was quite fitting.
Enjoy!
Take care,
Anayo Awuzie
EIC of Carefree Mag
How Social Media Ruined Horoscopes For Me
by Anayo Awuzie
A few weeks ago, I trekked to East Oakland to get my first install of knotless braids. It’s common to leave the hair salon feeling like you just went to therapy, caught up on the latest pop culture tea, and got a sleek new hairstyle all in one. This time was no different—my stylist and I talked the day away when we landed on the topic of our dating lives and began trading stories.
She lamented over her exes and detailed how each of their astrological signs was a red flag: “Aquarius’ are liars and emotionally manipulative and a Pisces man? Girl, good luck!”
As she shared her bad experiences with each sign, I thought about my good experiences with those signs and vice versa. Her commentary was nothing I hadn’t heard before from online meme pages, hood healers, and tarot readers. I can go on Twitter right now and see multiple tweets on how “if a (insert gender) is a (insert sign), then run!” At that moment, I realized that this flattening of people into one-dimensional stereotypes based solely on their birthdays had taken the joy out of horoscopes.
Interest in horoscopes has hit a crescendo. It’s almost mandatory to meet someone, whether platonic or romantic and ask them about their zodiac sign. We’re overjoyed when a new friend tells us they too are an earth sign, whereas we silently start planning our exit when a date tells us they’re a fire sign—because mutable and fixed don’t mix. And it’s not surprising, thanks to the omnipresence of horoscopes and astrology on social media, interest in the signs and planets hit a 10-year high in 2020, according to Google Trends.
And while I’m glad people are tapping into this kind of spirituality, I’m also slightly over it. What used to be a very niche, an almost existential way for people to learn more about themselves in this expansive universe, has become the only thing I ever need to know about you. It tells me if we can be friends or are sexually compatible and confirms any preconceived notions I may have had. Everyone is now very aware of the characteristics of their sign and others. Before getting to know someone, people use little information about your sign to determine if you’re worthy of their time. It’s a bit unhealthy and toxic.
My introduction to horoscopes probably started as it did for most girls in the 90s, with lifestyle magazines. I’d flip to the last few glossy pages and peruse my horoscope. I didn’t think much of it; I just knew I was a Virgo, as was Michael Jackson, and that was that. As a shy, introspective pre-teen, reading my horoscope every month was a way to get out of my head to receive more clarity on my life.
Enjoying Carefree Mag? Tap the heart & share it! 😍
Share on Twitter | Share on Facebook | Share via email | View past stories
I'm yet to understand how zodiac signs came to be of importance to the universe. Everywhere you look, someone - dating shows, talk shows and more are saying something about it. Personally, I've never been interested in it.
Happy birthday Anayo 🎈🥳 wishing you an amazing trip around the sun!